Happy Birthday to Me (1981)

Though she's only just returned to the area after several years away, Virginia has already become a member of the "Top Ten" (the most popular kids in school), so it's too bad that the group has begun to disappear one after the other! It's eventually disclosed to viewers that Virginia's been the recipient of experimental brain regeneration after being in a crash which killed her mother. Could the fact that she can't remember where she was/what she was doing at the times of her friends' disappearances be connected? Hopefully her therapist (Glenn Ford!!???) can help her get to the bottom of things.

I mean, her friends all suck but Virginia kinda sucks too as she seems indifferent to the common courtesy of not dating a friend's ex. Still, no one deserves the insanity of the last scene.

D+

The Invisible Man (1933)

A scientist stumbles upon an injection that causes invisibility (and, it seems, criminal tendencies), but hasn't yet cracked the antidote. In order to work without interruption, he travels to a small town in a snowstorm and takes a room while concealing his condition under heavy winter wrappings. Soon his violent temper gets him evicted and he responds by terrorizing the town and eventually killing a cop.

The good: the special effects are quite impressive and I bought the terror from his best friend. The bad: the silly comments while harassing the public (especially since they didn't seem to be audible to his victims) and the fact that no one could figure out how to catch him even though it was often clear where he was. The wtf: because he had to be naked to be undetectable, all I could think of was his wide open ass whenever we saw a chair indent because he'd sat in it.

C+

Waiting for the Barbarians (2020)

The colonial magistrate in a remote desert outpost is enjoying quiet days of harmony with the natives. The small group of soldiers that are there to guard the outpost are often napping as there is no threat posed by the population. But then a colonel arrives with orders to uncover details about an impending "barbarian" uprising and his interrogation techniques eventually reap "information."

Mark Rylance as the magistrate delivers a nuanced performance, but he's the whole show here. I'd have preferred to have some insight from the perspective of the soldiers whose change in behavior felt out of nowhere to me. They went from an easy relationship the locals and their magistrate to monstrously treating them all like actual barbarians. I wanted to see it happen -- feel what they felt as their allegiances shifted. Was it just as simple as "following orders"? Well then, how would that account for the jeering and casual cruelties? Show me or lose me.

The parallels between this story and the current political tactic of name-calling and straight-up fabrication to gain influence ("they're eating the dogs! they're eating the cats!") was not lost on me -- basically, I know this can happen because I've seen it in 2020s America, but this film provided no insight as to the why. Just like the magistrate, I'm confused about what is gained by creating enemies where none existed.

C

Sundown (2022)

Neil is on vacation at a luxury Acapulco resort with his sister and her kids when news is received that his mother has died. Rather than rush back with the others, he pretends to have misplaced his passport in order to stay behind. He tells the taxi driver to take him to a hotel and checks in without question, even though it's clearly low-rent establishment in a dangerous area. And then, he just coasts: spending his days on the beach drinking, eating and romancing what's put in front of him. Within a few days he's no longer responding to calls and texts from home.

Though we are kept deliberately in the dark about what's going on with this guy, I couldn't help but root for him and I'm not sure this would've been the case if Neil were played by anyone other than Tim Roth. With very little dialogue, we can tell that he's not an asshole despite the obvious interpretation of his behavior. His quiet coasting continues even through a short stint in jail after he is implicated in a violent crime. We do get a concrete reason for his actions by the end, but I think I would've liked this every bit as much if there had just been no reason at all.

B+

Coyote vs. Acme (2026)

Bugs Bunny was Saturday morning appointment television when I was growing up so I was absolutely giddy with anticipation when I saw the trailer several months back. The idea is brilliant: Wile E. Coyote hires a personal injury lawyer to bring suit against Acme for its faulty products. But, somehow, this never leaned into the silliness that made the shorts such classics. Sure, there are tons of explosions, but I never found myself chuckling or even smiling.

Will Forte, John Cena and Lana Condor are all well-cast and very game, so I can only fault the script and, possibly, the silence of Wile E., when everyone who knows Looney Tunes is aware that he can speak (see below). I really wanted to love this, but it felt way too long and way too convoluted and just didn't charm me the way I was expecting.

C+