West Side Story (2021)

I didn't want to see this. I held out until the Oscar nominations were announced before caving. And, I admit, that when the lights dimmed and the first whistles of the theme started, I got chills. Maybe I was just being silly and precious about the original? 

Alas, I was right to avoid it in the first place.

Why on earth does this movie exist? And, if it must exist, why would someone with -- I'm guessing -- thousands of screenplays just begging for his attention be the one to do it? This is like Han's quickdraw being erased... but, also, Han is now played by Ashton Kutcher. Seriously -- why were two such voids of personality chosen as the leads? And why in the name of all that's holy does Anita (now playing Doc's PR wife, who runs the drugstore) now get to sing "A Place for Us"???? It's downright baffling. The budget is an estimated $100,000,000. A HUNDRED MILLION -- and that's before marketing costs. The original exists. The original is amazing. This? THIS?? It's an embarrassment. 

It's only not an "F" because I saw it with my son who has never seen the original and he pronounced it "fine." So, alright -- fine. It's apparently not an abomination to those who don't know any better. Kind of like cool whip tastes alright to people who've never had actual whipped cream, I guess.

D