The Merry Gentleman (2009)

The plot could have very easily felt convoluted or, at the very least, saccharine. In a nutshell: the paths of a depressed hit man and a young wife, on her own since leaving her abusive husband, cross during the Christmas season. Instead of overplaying anything, this was quiet and lovely.

This just hit the spot for me. Michael Keaton does a beautiful job in the title role and behind the camera for the first time. I also have a soft spot for Kelly MacDonald and her gorgeous Scottish accent. Everything gels here.

Loved it.

A

Star Trek (2009)

Even though I'm not -- at all -- a fan of any incarnation of Star Trek, I thought this was actually pretty great. It was obviously an introductory chapter for a franchise, but it still worked well. When I thought about it afterward, I realized that the plot could be easily summed up in just a sentence or two. While that may sound like a complaint, I actually believe that keeping the plot to a minimum and the spectacle at the fore was a smart strategy for bringing newbies in.

I do want to point out that Kirk goes sliding off the edge of something, forced to hang on by his fingertips, THREE DIFFERENT TIMES during this thing. No one involved in the production thought that might be a tad much?

B

The Twilight Saga: New Moon (2009)

Improves not only on the first movie, but also on the source material by a considerable margin.

Kristen Stewart actually does a decent job of portraying the depression of heartbreak and the recklessness of someone who cares nothing for herself. The "I see my missing boyfriend every time I do something dangerous" sequences that were mind-bogglingly ridiculous in the book are translated into something surprisingly beautiful and understandable onscreen.

The problem? Robert Pattinson. Every line is delivered as though he's working to hold back a sneeze and his make-up was CRAZY. Dude looked as though he'd just finished a passionate session with a cherry popsicle. I really don't understand how this guy landed the part. To my eyes, he's the opposite of magnetic -- maybe the limited Pattinson is why this installment worked so well.

B

Outrage (2009)

For a movie titled "Outrage," I felt as though there was very little to be found here.

This is a documentary with a bunch of talking (gay) heads, who tell us about their efforts to out the gay government figures who vote against gay interests. It's certainly an interesting subject and many of their points are compelling, but it was just so dry. I'm actually not quite sure what they did wrong, but I was in the mood for some indignation -- I was a choir member ready for some preachin' -- but I wound up bored rather than riled.

C-

Spring Breakdown (2009)

OK -- I'll admit that I laughed during the first scene: Rachel Dratch, Parker Posey, and Amy Poehler singing their little birkenstocky hearts out during a college talent-show performance of "True Colors." Yes, I'm appropriately ashamed.

I tried to track down a clip of the first scene to embed in this post, but I can't find one anywhere -- I guess Warner Bros. understands that no one would bother renting or buying this movie if they could see its one amusing scene for free. Damn skippy.

D

Blindness (2008)

The world has been infected with a fast-spreading blindness virus. The first wave of infected are quickly quarantined and, since none of the sighted want to risk sight to help them, they're left on their own to figure out how to govern their (hopefully) temporary society.

I loved this film in a way that surprised me. I don't really know what I was expecting; the previews made it look like another I Am Legend or Omega Man -- you know, an "it's the end of the world and there's only one person left" type deal, only this time it's sight rather than life that's been taken from all but one of a group of people. But, somehow, this was wholly original. I was completely captivated and am eager to read the novel on which it's based.

A-

Where the Wild Things Are (2009)

I'm pretty sure that I'm supposed to either love or hate this movie -- so it feels a little like I must not have quite gotten it that my feelings, though warm, are not rapturous. There were moments of real beauty, but it just didn't speak to me through the entire narrative the way that I was expecting and hoping it would.

Max Records (the boy in the grubby footy pajamas) is a real find. My favorite sequence in the film was before he ran off to the Wild Things -- when he was playing alone, then soaring high in an impromptu snowball fight, swinging quickly to fear and tears when the fight gets scary, then to rage in the aftermath. Oh, how my former nine-year-old self could relate to Record's genuine performance.

I also really enjoyed the bulk of the time spent with the Wild Things. The voice work was amazing: each character was imbued with such vivid personality and there was casual wisdom dropped and magic made -- I truly believed these creatures and their hurt feelings, sudden rages, and easy forgiveness. Despite that, it did start to feel pretty draggy about two-thirds of the way through, which will always knock a movie down a bit for me.

B+

Surveillance (2009)

Special agents come to nowheresville to question some witnesses and the local authorities about a few murders.

I always hate depictions of people in positions of trust taking advantage of others, so the fact that there were cops messing around with motorists by shooting out their tires was enough to make me clench my jaw. But turning those stops into full-on "all in good fun" assault made me pretty ragey. And those horrid traffic stops looked like small potatoes by the time the credits rolled.

The movie was, in all, just ugly. There's a twist, but you'll see it coming a mile away if you bother to watch it for any length of time.

In a word, "ick."

D+

The Answer Man (2009)

Jeff Daniels plays Arlen Faber, a guy who writes an inspirational book about a conversation with God and spends the next couple of decades running away from the public whose idea of spirituality he has helped to shape.

I've always rather liked Jeff Daniels. I think he's a smart actor who chooses interesting projects. This film was, actually, just like him: smart and interesting, but veering off into the predictable every so often -- most obviously (and depressingly) at the very end of the film. It felt as those the filmmakers suddenly got in a hurry to wrap it up so they did it in the most "duh" way possible.

Another complaint: sticking both Olivia Thirlby and Kat Dennings in this movie -- they're both young, quirky actresses playing offbeat overly-familiar assistants. That's more than simply unnecessary, it's redundant.

B-

Anvil: The Story of Anvil (2009)

We're die-hard Spinal Tap fans -- I mean, seriously, Gary actually went to one of their concerts during the Break Like the Wind tour...and, yes, that album title still makes me snicker. When we heard about this movie, we knew we had to see it.

The first 20 minutes or so are extremely entertaining. "Like a real-life Spinal Tap!" we nodded to each other, echoing the film's publicity. But, once we finally settled into their world, our smiles faded and it just felt so very sad. It's so much fun to laugh when everyone's in on the joke, but it was as impossible to keep chuckling at Anvil as it would be to point and laugh at an armless man trying to work a doorknob.

Basically, I was cringing and praying for it end while "Lips" (the band's driving force) just wanted to keep on rocking. I wound up wondering if the guy might have a bit of a mental deficiency. Good times.

C

Inventing the Abbotts (1997)

I think that this is trying hard to be reminiscent of the melodramas from the '50s (think Peyton Place or Raintree County) -- small towns full of secrets and angst, the sins of the parents being visited on their poor miserable children.

Well, I didn't like the old ones and this update isn't any better. As a matter of fact it's worse because at least the secrets in the aforementioned films were juicy. The secret in this one is quite the letdown and makes all the posturing that came before the reveal feel childish rather than tragic...and that renders the entire exercise a waste of time.

D+

Sleuth (2007)

I've seen neither the play nor the 1972 film adaptation, so I can't natter on about the changes and which is best -- I can just say that this was fine, though a little too stagey to be much more than clever at arm's length.

There were quite a few times that I felt a bit off balance for a few seconds before "catching up" to what was actually happening, which may sound like a fun idea but didn't actually wind up working all that well. I was rather annoyed by the end.

C

Mogambo (1953)

It's Clark Gable (I love him!) as a great white hunter in Africa and Grace Kelly (hey! I love her too!) as the prim married Brit he falls for and Ava Gardner (hey! Um...Ava Gardner!) as the showgirl who falls for him.

Yeah, that sounds a whole lot better than it actually is. What's actually delivered is a bunch of safari footage with a contrived love triangle pasted over it while the female members of the triangle point and coo "Beautiful!" and "Look at that!" toward animals which are obviously in another film altogether.

C-