Extract (2009)

Terrible movie. All of the "jokes" were stepped on, the story was stupid, the characters stupider, and there was this weird pacing that made it impossible to know exactly how much time was supposed to have elapsed from scene to scene, which would have been more annoying if I'd have cared what was happening, let alone when.

Not funny. Not worthwhile in any way. I'm serious.

F

Bad Santa, Director's Cut (2003)

I've thought about Bad Santa so many times since my first viewing more than five years ago. It's one of those movies that can make me absolutely lose it if I mentally flash onto one of its many over-the-top scenes. Gary and I quote it quite a bit for a seen-only-once movie, so I was really looking forward to seeing it again.

Well, what a disappointment. Was it that I'd misremembered the funny? Not at all. It was that we picked up a different cut of the dang thing -- a cut that was missing a couple of the best scenes: teaching the always-picked-on Thurman to box and the plucking of a candy corn from behind the advent calendar's repaired door ("They can't all be winners, kid"). Just further fuel for my old-lady-shaking-her-fist argument that there should be one and ONLY ONE version of each movie so we've all got the same thing in mind when we discuss film. Gah.

This version was OK, but I doubt I'd have been laughing five years later if this had been the one I'd seen first.

B-

Rear Window (1954)

I'd guess this is my eighth viewing -- but I can quote huge sections, so that's probably a conservative estimate. This time I was introducing my younger son to this near-perfect movie.

Simply put: it's one of my favorites. Jimmy Stewart, Grace Kelly, and Thelma Ritter make a terrific trio as, respectively, a restless photographer with a broken leg stuck staring out of the window in his stuffy apartment, the society belle hopelessly in love with him, and his no-nonsense nurse.

Even if they never saw anything interesting through the window, I think I'd still enjoy a couple of hours in the company of these characters (and actors). Funny, romantic, and suspenseful -- a treasure.

A+

Julie & Julia (2009)

"Yes" to an entire movie with Meryl Streep as Julia Child in France and a big "no" to any more film time being dedicated to the insufferably self-centered Julie Powell, the depiction of whom was so irksome that it left a bit of "I don't think I like her" residue on Amy Adams.

Every time we left Julia for the whiny Julie, Gary and I groaned. I wanted to fast-forward through all of her portions so we could get back to the good stuff.

An A for Child and a D for Powell gives us...

C+

An Education (2009)

Jenny, a high school good girl, meets David, a smooth, older gentleman and is all-too-eager to be swept away into the exciting, seemingly carefree, life he and his friends enjoy. There were a couple of reasons I fully expected to just love this film. I'm crazy about Peter Skarsgaard and, as a Doctor Who fan, the idea of darling Sally Sparrow getting the lead in an attention-getting movie thrilled me. I also saw the trailer a couple of months before it came out here and it just looked like my cup of tea.

But there was something off about this. I think that the problem could have been that we didn't spend enough time in Sally's "pre-David" life. Supposedly, her father ruled the roost with an iron fist and Jenny had no life outside of school and music practice -- but she so quickly becomes eye-rolling and disrespectful at home that it's hard to believe that Dad ever had any control in the relationship. Another thing was that I was neither appalled nor enthralled by David's attentions toward Jenny -- and it seems as though indifference to the relationship couldn't possibly be what the screenplay intended for the audience.

Great acting and a promising premise somehow came out kind of flat.

B-

Gomorrah (2008)

I'm almost embarrassed to admit it, but I had a hard time following this movie. The Netflix sleeve insisted that the tales were "intertwined," but I felt more as though we were simply skipping between half a dozen disparate stories -- the only commonalities between them being the threat of violence and the actuality of violence.

Without the context of what was happening (an overview of which appears in blocks of text only after the movie's images have played), it was simply a lengthy visit with the horror of Italian gangs and their recruitment. Nothing was incisive, so nothing wound up sticking. It was just too much stuff with too little meaning.

C-

Premonition (2007)

I like my Sandra Bullock smiley, thanks. But if she's just GOT to do one of those dark roles, the story has to be solid enough to bear a little scrutiny -- and this dud just can't cut it.

The story (my husband's dead! No he isn't! My daughter's face is ruined! No it isn't! I'm crazy! No I isn't!) was ridiculously confusing and there was never any "why" offered. Add to that the fact that I absolutely hated Bullock's character and her moody lump of a husband, and there's really no reason to care about any of it.

F

Le Cirque: A Table in Heaven (2007)

This documentary about Le Cirque, formerly the center of New York's restaurant world, truly tried my patience.

We spend the first chapter in New York, with '80s footage of the original location fawning over its star patrons (news personalities, politicians, and actors). That's interesting, just from a history standpoint, but probably would've been more so if I were either a New Yorker or had visited the restaurant at some point.

We eventually make our way to Las Vegas, were the Maccioni family -- ruled with dismissive annoyance by Sirio -- is working to get a new location of La Cirque off the ground. If this were just a focused look at the mechanics about the work that goes into opening a large-scale restaurant, I think this could have been fascinating. But this was more about the Macccioni clan itself and their petty squabbles between spoiled adult children and the struggle to maintain dignity in the face of a demeaning father who must have his way, even when it's obvious to everyone else it's the wrong way.

Not an enjoyable family with whom to spend any time -- even the short 78 minutes this film ran.

D

Is Anybody There? (2009)

Michael Caine plays the former magician "The Amazing Clarence," now simply the newest resident in a nursing home. Clarence isn't happy about being there -- in fact, he's not happy about much. Edward is the son of the couple who recently converted their house into said nursing home. Edward's not happy about his home and bedroom being commandeered by old people. So, do you think these two will remind each other of the simple joys in life and that friendship can be found in anyone? Sigh.

The only real surprise in this film is the fact that the leads seem to be directed more toward realism, even as the story's trappings run toward the adorable. Clarence is misanthropic and Edward is pissy and that actually made the movie palatable.

C+